Reaching out to old friends

Updated: Apr 27

There's no excuse, we only have one life so don't leave it too late, friendship is worth putting yourself out there for, here's how.

Firstly, the benefits to your health when it comes to having long-lasting friendships is absolutely incredible. Maintaining a healthy friendship can be rocky with everything happening in each other's lives, but now is the time to remember why we are friends.

Thanks to technology there really are no excuses anymore, we can rekindle a friendship in under 10 minutes by sending an email, call, text or card. It isn't easy, especially if things ended and tough terms, but there are many ways we can come around this.

Forget your pride

Admitting you miss someone or care about them according to the experts is truly difficult because it feels like you're making yourself more vulnerable. But whatever it was that cut your friendship off, don't be embarrassed, who cares, we have one life and it's totally worth fighting for. Whatever may have happened, you were a different person than to who you are today, that in itself is a good enough argument as we all change and grow.

Be sure you're ready to reconnect

Not everyone deserves your time and attention when it comes to reconnecting that's for sure, a lot of us will outgrow many relationships and it's only natural. When looking back at the friendship with someone you're hesitating to reconnect with don't forget the past always looks different, it may look a lot better than you remember or it may look so much worse than it actually was.

Go slow

When making contact with this person, try not to become intimate straight away, especially with someone you were really close to. A few tips could be to write down any issues you have or had about the relationship. It's good to keep things raw, it means you won't slide back into the same routine that may have got you into the situation you're in with you long lost friend.

Start completely fresh

New times mean new people, it's more than likely you will both be very different people, be curious about their new life. It's a good idea to not assume they are still the exact same person, keep a close watch and learn from your friend as if they were a completely new person. Ask yourself if this person standing in front of me can still fit into my life.

Leaving the friendship door open is a great option because it means you both have options, you aren't locked into anything, because as we know, as soon as pressure is applied people seem to get scared. Understanding new boundaries will actually depend on a friendship, it will lock in good emotion and sense of knowing someone.

Don't over expect

You can put in as much effort as you possibly can, it doesn't mean it will work, you will at least be able to say that you tried which is more than enough. A good reminder will be that your friend may still be hurt or have things on their mind, so you will need to have prepared for this and be as understanding as you possibly can be. If you choose to reconcile, don't expect too much, be yourself and be a good listener, learn about your friend as if you've only met a few times.



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